The Belgarde beauties.

I went clubbing in Belgrade, down to the river and onto one of the boats. I was with some solvenians who had told me Serbian music was famous. Serbian pop is distictive and very popular in Serbia, unlike almost all countires in Europe, British and American music has not invaded here. This lucky circumstance, is the result of two reasons; pirde and isolation. An overty nationalist population who cling tooth and nail to their culure and the Serbian lonileiness imposed first by Tito and then Sloberdan has meant the Serbs have had to retreat inwards. I dont suppose the Serbs would like to hear it, but you can hear, the East in their music. The Ottoman empire never left, its hiding behind the Electroic, synthesiers, electric guitar and a girl warballing. She might say its Vibratto, but this was more Istanbul than Italien. There is a minarets call to prayer, somwhere in those songs, its quite good. I was battered though and everything sounds quite good to me when I'm batterd.

I asked the Slovieans what she was singing about but I had already guessed, I was told in Serbia all the songs are the same, about falling in love or unrequited love. As it was and is everywhere, as it will be for evermore. The lead singer was beautiful, stunning, jaw dropping, salvia dribbiling, eye-poppingly attractive. When I first saw her I thought Id have a heart attack. She was so fit. I told this to the Sloveians who with brilliant inisght said:

"But of course, if she wasn't noone would be here"

The women in Belgrade are so beautiful, Ive never seen anything like it. Every other girl will turn your head. There waists are so thin, theres not a gram of fat on anyone under the age of thirty, but they all have full bososoms. I couldn't stop stareing. They have perfect posture and dress well too, not as well as girls in england, but they aren't as chubby as girls in england. Not only that, these beauties from the way they act there pleasent bearing, there girl next door attitude, there easy nature, there apperance of innocence and there harmless attitude which says to all men "I'd be nice to you if we met in a Pub"; I have a suspision that most dont think they are special at all. I told this too, to the Sloveians who agreed and said Serbain women in The Balklands, were famously attractive. Really you have to see for yourself.

To underline, this dichtomy between beauty and niceness, I'll tell you about one of the strangest things I have seen in my life. In central Belgrade there is a fountain and everyday while I was there on the steps of the fountain there were over one hundread adults swapping football stickers. Thats right football stickers. About seventy percent of these swappers were men, but the other thirty percent were women. There is no doubt that this is a geeks hobby, and geeks aren't famous for there looks. I asked at the hostel and the receptionist said, that it was a geeks hobby in Serbia too. So here you have over thirty Serbian female geeks, swapping their stickers and half of these were really fit. Really, really fit, about another quarter were pretty, and I didnt see a single horror show there. I cant imagine you would find those conditions at a Sci-fi convention in the UK or for that matter anywhere in the world.

Belgrade is pretty ugly, some of it still looks bombed, but the women outshine the city, they are its absolute light, its sirens call. I have a further suspicion of my own. I loved Belgrade, I had a great time, I can't but my finger on why, I think it could be the clubs or the food, but I think deep down I know, it might just be the Biological drive. Darwin never sleeps, Freud would have agreed, I think I might just like this city because the women are so fit.

Serbia has so much to offer, as do all the Balklands, they are so rich with life and history. Still, you can't escape the conflict, it lies just beneath the surface ready to bubble up. Muslim V Christian, East V West, this could be as much a battle ground as Afghanistan if you added a little more fuel to the fire. Its tragic, both communities have been here for centuries, mutually influencing each far more than either realise and would ever care to admit. This endless circle of conflict and hate, mutual suspicion. There is no consolation except that of Philosophy.

"What God has set such enmity between two truths that established desperately they refuse to bare the common yolk"